well, life seems so hard to deal, so hard so make it easy, so hard to get something you want, so hard to be what want to be, it's like you are riding a roller coaster. Life seems so dark especially when you don't know where to go and what you want to do. So hard to determine whether you're in the right or wrong path. You will not even know when to turn left or right. It's like walking in the long, dark and full of challenges road, nowhere to go, no one to talk to, no one can guide, no one can tell you the right way, no one can light up your way and it's like you are alone in this cruel world...
i experienced to be lost in life for ones...i don't want that to happen again...as long as it is possible, i want to be on the way i always wanted but, what will i do, i am just a sinful human being, prone to sin and temptations? what my life holds on for me? i always ask that question to myself...but the answer is in me...no one can give answers to me but myself...i am the one making my future...i am the one making my life and it seem that it's hard to make a sketch for it...i am holding my destiny...and i rely on my fate...but sometimes fate not good to me...but i continue living the way i wanted...in the way of doing things that can make me happy...happiness that no one can supply it for me...happiness to treasure forever...happiness that i should look back when i come to my end...at least i can tell to myself that ones in life i taste the sweetness and had it in the fullest way...smiling gently deep inside my heart...satisfaction comes on me...now i'm ready to face death...but my happiness still be alive in my heart where ever god put me in the end...i now know that success can be counted and has its own price but happiness has no certain value...you cannot buy it...no amount of money can be equal to it...happiness is all i ever wanted...happiness is all i ever dream...now i feel that it soon to be happen...soon to be experienced...soon to be savor...there's only one man who can complete it...the man that i ever wanted...one man that i ever dreamed of...the man that can give color and meaning to my life...who is he? he's in my heart...he's in my mind...he's in the deepest part of my soul...who is he? my heart can only answer it...my heart can only reveal it...who is he? he's the man i love...the man who give me security...the man who give courage...the man who give light and show the way...the man that is always in my side and stand there like a solid rock....who is he? the answer is in me...it's my baby....